A Break Up Letter is always very hard to write, especially when the relationship has been long but sometimes, due to character changes or widening differences, a couple has no choice but to break up. A break up letter should be carefully worded so that the recipient will not be devastated by the contents and purpose of the letter.
Sample Break Up Letter for Husband
Jim,
You are such a worthless, lazy, good for nothing slob. I’m so sick of you that I can barely come home at night. I’m through. I’m tired of picking up your dirty clothes off of the floor and making you dinner every night for you to just sit there and contribute nothing.
We used to be a great team but ever since you lost your job things have only gotten worse and worse. First, you stopped paying attention to me. Then, you stopped playing with the kids. Now all you ever do is play video games and watch TV. What happened to the days when we worked side by side as a team? Don’t you miss them? Do you ever miss working in the garden together? We haven’t even had one for three years because I can’t get you to plow it up.
I know that you have been through a hard time and I’m not trying to be insensitive to that. I just feel like you’ve given up. I mean you’ve had plenty of opportunities to pick yourself back up off of the ground and get started again. I’m not even talking about a job here. Yes, it bothers me that you are not working but I wouldn’t leave you over it. I’m leaving because you don’t contribute anything anymore and you actually make my life harder.
Just like yesterday. I came home after working 12 hours. I was exhausted. I’m not even going to bring up the point that I wouldn’t be working 12 hours if you had a job. But anyway, I came home. The house was a mess. I made dinner, did two loads of laundry, did the dishes, gave the kids baths and helped them with their homework. When I finally got to sit down I fell asleep in the living room chair. THAT’S where I woke up at 3 a.m.
Okay, now let’s talk about your night last night. When I came home, you were playing video games. You ate your dinner in front of the TV while the kids and I ate in the dining room. You said maybe one or two words to me the whole night and those were mostly to let me know that I was blocking your precious view of the game. You never bothered to lift a finger. You watched me lug that heavy laundry up and down the stairs and never even got up to help. Then you went to bed and left me laying there.
I can’t even remember the last time you kissed me goodnight let alone the last time we made love. I just can’t live like this anymore. I deserve so much better. I deserve to be loved. The kids deserve better. They deserve a father who will go out and play ball with them in the yard. They deserve a role model. I’m sorry, Jim, it’s over.
Kate
Sample Break Up Letter for Boyfriend
Dear Jason
It is time for us to break up because I can’t take your possessive jealousy anymore. You are unable to trust me despite the fact I have never given you a reason for mistrust. You are continuously questioning me when I come back home, from work or just a simple trip to the store.
You go through all my drawers. I do not know what you expect to find but I deserve some privacy and would never dream of doing this to you. You know that I care about you but I just cannot get you to understand that I am not doing anything to make you feel this way.
You tap into my email listen in on my phone calls. What are you trying to find? You know I have always been faithful to you and wanted us to bond. But you are not giving us a chance. Your mistrust of me has destroyed our relationship and I don’t see that you can or will change. Rather than fighting a lost battle with you I would rather quit this relationship and break up. I know it will be better for us both after the break and we can stop torturing each other and move on.
You watch me like a hawk even when we are together. How can we enjoy a romantic dinner when all you can think of is if I am looking at some other guy? Why can’t you just enjoy our relationship without suspecting my every move? I take you as you are and have never questioned your integrity there is just no reason that you cannot do the same for me.
I need my space and you are just suffocating me with your obsessive behavior. If you are just unable to trust me then we are through. A relationship is based on trust and you are unable to give me this. I don’t want to discuss this further because I am tired of explaining my innocence to you. We need to break up and go our separate ways. We need to end this misery for us both.
I hope you will be able to understand and will not get hurt by this but you know deep down that we cannot go on in this way. We are just hurting each other too much. I know that you do not want to hurt me and believe that you are doing this because you care about me but we cannot continue a relationship like this. So let’s part as friends and move on with our lives.
Dawn
Sample Break Up Letter for Girlfriend
Kit,
I can’t believe you didn’t come home again last night. I waited up till three but still no Kit. What the hell am I supposed to do? Just sit here and let you go out and screw whoever you want and act like it’s not happening? My brother told me you were troubled. He said you had a reputation even back when you two went to high school together. At first, I didn’t think anything about it cos you were a lot of fun to hang out with. Guess I know now why your always the life of the party.
I ran into Sam Bradley the other day. He seemed so surprised that we were living together. He was so nervous acting that he almost knocked over the display trying to get away from me. So what do I do? I go ask his buddy Pete about it. Pete doesn’t really know me that well but I thought that he’d give me an honest answer for some reason.
So he says that you were at a party about a week ago. Must have been the night that I busted up my knee and was in the hospital cos I don’t remember any other night it could’ve been. Anyway, he said that you had screwed Sam that night and another one of his buddies T.J. at the same time. That’s just sick Kit. I can’t believe that you would do that. That’s my shit that you’re messing with. What if you brought something home to me? What if you get pregnant by some other guy and I end up having to raise his kid? I just can’t do this.
There are other stories too but I didn’t believe them at the time. Now I’m thinking that they were probably all true. And when I remember what I’ve been told it makes me want to strangle you. Did you really let Jim come into my house and have you while I was at work? What about that thing with Corey? Was he really just an annoying guy who had a crush on u or was it something more? Y’know what. I don’t even want to know what happened for real. Just let it go.
I’ll let it go but you have to go. I want you out of my house by the time I come home from work. I don’t care who you have to call to pack out all of your shit but you better have it gone. Why don’t you ask a few of your guy friends to do it for you? I’m sure they’ll be more than happy to help you out. They might want a little something in return but hey, your good at that.
BTW don’t call me, don’t text me, don’t look at me if you see me. I’m done. I don’t ever want to see you again. If I do, you might regret it. I’m sure you’ll regret it.
XXXXX
Sample Break Up Letter for Him or Her
Dear …
I don’t want to be with you anymore because our relationship is going nowhere. I wanted to tell you so many times that our relationship was over but just couldn’t do it. I really do not want to hurt you but this is not going to work and it’s better for us to part. Today I decided to get everything out in the open and finally make the break.
I realize our relationship is not what it should be. We have been just existing for but not truly bonding with each other. Our relationship has been dead for a long time and I am just hurting you by trying to continue with something that just isn’t there. I can’t keep on “flogging a dead horse” and expecting something to come out of this relationship. It is just not going to happen and we both need to understand this.
We fight constantly over small things and it seems we just do not agree on anything anymore. I want to part as friends and not let us both get so bitter that we will feel bad for the rest of our lives. So let’s part and go our separate ways and end this relationship and all the frustrations we are both feeling. I know deep down that you are feeling like me and want to end this but are not sure how so I am taking the first step.
I am writing about this rather than talking because there are some things I just don’t seem to be able to talk to you about. In fact, that’s another really important reason why our relationship can’t go on we just don’t talk anymore, every conversation ends up in a fight and nothing is ever settled. So let’s not torture each other anymore and just admit to each other it is over.
I truly believe that both of us will be happier just going our own ways. It’s time to move on and put this relationship behind us. I hope that like me you will remember the good times we have had and not let are recent fights and arguments fill you with bitterness. Let’s part as friends and look to a better future. I hope you can see this my way as I truly think that at this point a breakup would be best for us both.
XXXXXX
